For the record
In July 2026, a disagreement about how we talk about the dead turned into a series of videos and posts about me. Below is what was said about me, next to what I actually said, on video. Watch it, read it, and decide for yourself.
Start here · 3 min
Why this was about more than one disagreement.
The full rundown · 6 min
A note on these videos. These are my complete, unedited responses. I have taken them down from public view and removed the original commenter’s name. Not out of guilt. The person I was originally talking with did not want the drama and asked to close it down, and I complied out of respect. I have kept the full videos, unlisted, so nothing is hidden: my three original responses in order, one, two, and three, and the full breakdown.
Where I agreed with him · 40 sec
Uncut moments, pulled straight from my own three videos, where I agreed with the substance of his point. The only real disagreement was whether arguing online changes the offline world, not whether the norm should change.
How it started
The conversation was already happening between me and the commenter. Look at the timestamps: the commenter and I both replied about two hours in. Sunn joined 47 minutes ago. He stepped into a conversation that was already underway.
He told it two ways · 17 sec
In one of his videos he said I “slid up in the middle” of his conversation. In the next, he said he “approached her first.” Both are his own words. The timeline above shows he joined 47 minutes after the commenter and I were already talking.
His claims · and what I actually said
What he said
She jumped into his conversation with Anthony
What I actually said
I was already talking with the commenter when he stepped in. The timestamps show he joined 47 minutes into a conversation that was already happening. And in his next video he admitted, in his own words, that he approached me first.
What he said
I used the word “normal”
What I actually said
I said, at the time, that I never used that word. The commenter used it. On video I ask directly, “who are you quoting?”
What he said
He played a clip of me, cut off mid‑sentence
What I actually said
He stopped my clip right before the part that changes its meaning. What I said next was: “I also know lots of nice people whose funerals I’ve gone to. The point is, offline, this has been the norm.” I was describing a norm, not confessing to one.
What he said
That I centered myself, and that my point was aimed at Black people
What I actually said
My point was about white commenters criticizing Black politicians, not Black voters (see below). “Willy nilly” is a 400‑year‑old English idiom. He never once asked me what I meant. He assumed.
What he said
This was white‑womaning, casting him as a brute
What I actually said
On video I say the opposite: that his point is valid, that I am not invalidating him as a Black man, and that he earned his following. I agreed with the substance.
What he said
That I cast him as a bully and a brute
What I actually said
I never called him either. Not on video, not in a single post. Those were words he put in my mouth.
What he said
That I was making myself the victim
What I actually said
He is the one who demanded an apology, rejected it when it came, and pointed his followers my way.
What he said
That this is not my first controversy with Black folk
What I actually said
He does not name one. Not a single prior example.
What he said
I got his name wrong on purpose
What I actually said
I apologized, sincerely. I thought his name was “Sun M,” the way I am “Seema R.” I said I would call him Sun from then on.
What I was actually talking about
He built an attack on a guess: that my comment was aimed at Black people. It was not. I was talking about white commenters criticizing Black politicians. He never asked.
The “boy” claim
I never said that. That word does not appear in a single one of my videos. You can watch them all yourself: one, two, and three, and the full breakdown.
Note how it is framed: he does not say he saw it. He says other people told him, about a video he claims I deleted. A claim built so it cannot be checked.
The full record
I am not asking anyone to do anything. The record is here. Decide for yourself.